Thanks for joining me!

This Post was originally posted on – 8 August 2015 – since I have decided to move websites and restart my blog I thought I would re-share my old blog posts on here before starting with new ones. I hope you enjoy!

I’ve moved around for most of my life.

I haven’t found myself settling in one place for more than four years in the last ten years. Crazy? Perhaps! It seems great and it is, however there are also many struggles than one has to endure with such changes. I’m not complaining (not at all), I am very grateful for every single experience and moment. These changes have made me who I am today.

The thing is, ‘moving’ really does get you out of your comfort zone! Whether it is moving schools, houses, neighbourhoods or cities. Moving overseas is a whole new ball game. You are not only changing the place, you are de facto leaving EVERYTHING behind. The places and traditions you had become accustomed to, the people, your friends, family, beliefs, views and basically your way of life up until that moment. The first time I made such a huge move was when I was 14. Some of you will know, it is not easy being a 14 year-old teenage girl. You are just finding yourself, from simple things like the music you listen to, the activities that interest you, the friends you make, to more complex matters like what your dreams and aspirations are, and the ultimate – what you want to do with your life (the last being a question that I think we all will be asking ourselves more often than we would like to admit). After moving from Australia to Bulgaria, I felt out of place, my whole life had thwarted, just as I thought I had things half figured out I had to start all over again…I felt so alone.

Not much time went by, before things got better and I was truly happy. Happier than I had ever been! I made so many friends and was doing all the fun stuff that any teenager does. That was, until I realised my four years were up. I was graduating from high school. I had decided that the next logical step would be to go to University. Here we go again I thought. I had to start from the beginning…creating a new life. I chose the United Kingdom (I had never been there before, didn’t even go to the open days for the Universities). Next thing I knew, I had deferred and gone back home to Sydney, Australia because, well, the truth is because my parents were so nervous to let me be so far away from them. I got it, I totally did. So I went back to Australia and enrolled into University there. I got accepted and started my course, but boy was I in for a shock. One month passed, two months passed, three months passed and not a single friend was to be made, and not for failure of trying. Something strange was going on – I would ask classmates from different classes to hang out, but their response was “sorry, I’m meeting up with my friends from high school” and well, as I hadn’t finished high school in Australia, I didn’t have any high school friends to sit with. A few more months passed like this, I kept trying, but nothing seemed to stick. Maybe it was just the course I was in, I have no clue, but mid terms came around. I had already made up my mind about my next step, but before I did it, I sat the exams to prove to myself that I wasn’t chickening out, but that I was dropping out because that is was I wanted to do. I sat the exams and I passed them all. It was a bittersweet moment, but my mind was made, I was going to study in the United Kingdom, one way or another. And well that is the next step of my life. I was being dropped in an unknown city, with no friends or family this time! I did what any freaked out fresher would do (not really) – I locked myself in my room and I slept for fear that I would change my mind and leave that very minute. 😀 I thought, this time it would not be any different and that things would probably be similar to what I experienced in University in Sydney. I won’t be able to make friends this time “I told myself”. But, oh my goodness, how wrong I was. To my surprise I had made a new friend on the first day of enrolment. Crazy! I put this down to chance. It wasn’t. I had a circle of friends in no time and I was having so much FUN. I was happier than ever before. Wow, so this is what Uni is meant to be like! It surpassed all my expectations!

Three years later, yes, graduating again! What? Where had the time gone? Despite my surprise at the sudden approach of the end of my undergraduate degree, I had planned ahead and had been accepted to do a Masters. It was London this time. Okay, I told myself…you’ve done this so many times before…you can do it again! I graduated, had a wonderful summer break and then arrived in September in London (overpacked suitcase in tow). It was not my first time in London, plus I had friends living there. I did think that my first night would be a quiet and calm one, to allow me to settle in and during which I could overthink and worry about everything that could possibly go bad (lol usual me). How wrong I was, a friend called to meet up (that’s London for you, always a surprise awaiting just around the corner). The next day was enrolment and again, I found myself freaked out (can you tell, I freak out internally, a lot). My other classmates who I had yet to meet in real life, had organised (via the Facebook group for our year) to meet for lunch with others who were enrolling that day. I was eager, but after queuing and I’m sure you already know, but yes, overthinking (as I usually do) I was worried that I wouldn’t fit in or find friends. I walked out to see a large group of people and recognised some of the faces. I froze. It doesn’t seem reasonable, but after seeing such a large group of people I thought to myself…I should just go home! I turned to walk to the tube station…“it’s just the first day, I’ll meet them another time”…but thankfully a little voice in my head brought me to my senses. “It’s now or never”! And it was right, if I didn’t do it now I would always tell myself ‘next time’, which could eventually become…‘never’. You’ve got this I told myself, slowly and hesitantly I turned as if my body had a mind of its own. Before I could think of what to say (something witty of course) I found myself joining the circle and even sooner than I thought I had been included in the conversation. I have three words – BEST YEAR EVER! (It deserves it’s own post!!) 🙂

I’m now back home and again I am unsure what my next steps will be. However, what I do know and have learnt from everything is that you need to appreciate every moment and take it day by day. Don’t stress yourself with what could, would or should be. Hakuna Matata!!! Value what you have at that very moment, remember today is a gift that’s why it is called the present[1].

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Bill Keane Quote